We've been told he's a labrador.. Not looking anything like one yet - but we paid for a lab so thats what he is!
He is called Archie by the by (Thank you - but i already know he is black).
I had only suggested that my parents name the dog after a cartoon character
coz our 1st dog was called Dennis PLUS my parents had already told me they wanted to call him "something simple like Jimmy or Tommy".
If you knew anything about my life - you would see the humour in that line!

Achcha, i have a new theory which i must share.
There is a drama pie in everybodys life which indicates the emotion+drama quotient based on historcal data (fact)and somewhere unwittingly people design their lives to match up to this pie (theory).

What i mean is - if your life this far has had 10% drama in it - you will create 10% drama in the remaining portion of your life and similarly for all other emotions.
Even the portions of your life that are circumstance based and have caused pain - you will get used to having that pain in your life and will create that much pain in the rest of your life.

(my pie looks like this: love - 20%; comedy - 10%; limbo - 25%; tragedy - 12%;
bizarre & psycho type - 8%; intense un-scripted drama - 8%, anger - 7%,
hysteria - 5%, paranoia - 5%.)

Today i think is the 1st day of the winter - all the signs were there .. nip in the air, couldnt wake up in the morning etc... I hate the winters!

They say only the paradnoid survive...
I am going to live to be a 100!!

My dear dear M, my partner in crime, my other half, my very often better half..
This is for you.

As always when i hung up after speaking to you, I was grateful that i had you to speak to... Amused that we are such bitches... Happy that 1 billion re-runs of conversation later, you and me are still interesting to us...
Warmed at the thought that for every nonsense plan of mine - i will always have a supporter.. who may not say, "go for it", but will say, "have fun".

You're the best-est babe!!
All my love.

Gumshuda

I happened to watch DD1 for a bit - they were showing the "Lapatta" list. And it occured to me that i have not seen that piece of news in the longest time - since cable tv actually.
Shocking! 10+ news channels. Correction - thats 10+ 24 hours news channels.. and no lapatta list!
we can cover the gates of prateeksha during the abhi-ash wedding for 2 whole weeks - but we can't cover the missing persons list!

I guess it would be impossible to expect that i should not have accumulated any baggage.. it has been a long enough life!
you now no longer deal with just me, you deal with me times 28.. thats too much of me.. even for me to carry.. but i guess its a good start to recognise that some of this (me) is baggage.. and i would walk freer, lighter and swing my arms better without it.

A Short Poem by Peter Griffin

A cold evening

Drifts down from the Aravallis.

One ear stays warm.

Science would insist

That it's a cheap phone Heating up.

I know what it really is:

You called

To share the sunset.

I was telling J last evening.. unlike other drivers who seem to want to get from point A to point B - that does'nt seem to be my objective at all.. i drive with the objective of avoiding any on-coming traffif.. so for instance, i see car coming up ahead and quickly take left, a few more of these lefts later i discover i have come full circle...

i eventually get to where i am going .. but its not because i tried at all.. profound eh!?!

I've been told that most cultures have a saying which is the equivalent of "Squeaking doors get the oil". In India the equivalent is apparently, "The crying baby gets the milk"...

I've been told, the Chinese have a saying, "The nail that stands out gets hammered".

Found that very very interesting..

Fe fo fi fum.. i smell happiness.
or is it too early to proclaim..
maybe - but in the spirit of the moment etc - i am happy.. and this is momentous!

ATLAS
- Kay Ryan

Extreme exertion
isolates a person
from help,
discovered Atlas.
Once a certain
shoulder-to-burden
ratio collapses,
there is so little
others can do:
they can't
lend a hand
with Brazil
and not stand
on Peru.

Found this on cousins blog .. so pretty..

God Says Yes To Me
- Kaylin Haught

I asked God if it was okay to be melodramatic,
and she said yes
I asked her if it was okay to be short,
and she said - it sure is
I asked her if I could wear nail polish,
or not wear nail polish,
and she said honey
she calls me that sometimes,
she said you can do just exactly,
what you want to,
Thanks God I said
And is it even okay if I don't paragraph,
my letters
Sweetcakes God said
who knows where she picked that up
what I'm telling you is
Yes Yes Yes

One of my all time favourite hindi romantic songs...

Phoolon ke rang se, Dil ki kalam se, tujh ko likhi roz paati,
Kaise batao, kis kis tarah se, Pal pal mujhe tu satati ..

Tere hi sapne lekar ke soya, Teri hi yaadon mein jaaga
Tere khayaalon mein uljha raha yun, Jaise ke mala mein dhaaga

Haan~~ Badal Bijli Chandan Paani - jaisa apna pyaar, Lena hoga janam hume kai kai baar Haan~~ Itna madir, Itna madhur tere mera pyaar, Lena hoga janam hume kai kai baar
-
Saanson ki sargam, dhadkan ki beena, sapnon ki geetanjali tu,
Man ki gali mein mehke jo har dum, Aisi juhi ki kali tu

Chota safar ho, lamba safar ho, Sooni dagar ho ya mela
Yaad tu aaye man ho jaaye bheed ke beech akela

Haan~~ Badal Bijli Chandan Paani - jaisa apna pyaar, Lena hoga janam hume kai kai baar Haan~~ Itna madir, Itna madhur tere mera pyaar, Lena hoga janam hume kai kai baar
-
Purab ho Pachhim Uttar ho Dakshin, Tu har jagah muskuraaye
Jitna hi jaaon main door tujh se, Utni hi tu paas aaye

Aandhi ne roka, Paani ne toka, Duniya ne hans kar pukara
Tasveer teri lekin liye main ghar aaya sabse kinara

Haan~~ Badal Bijli Chandan Paani - jaisa apna pyaar, Lena hoga janam hume kai kai baar Haan~~ Itna madir, Itna madhur tere mera pyaar, Lena hoga janam hume kai kai baar
...Kai Kai Baar...Kai Kai Baar
-------------------------------------------------------------------

Invictus

Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll.
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

- William Ernest Henley

My inspired thought for this week...

I went for a training this week and and in one section of the training the coach (Michael Dale) was talking about negotiation.

He narrated a very simple story of someone who wanted to buy a grandfather clock. A grandfather clock is an expensive purchase - the approximate price for one is about $10,000. This one guy decides he absolutely has to have one and starts saving up to buy it.
Over the course of a few months he manages to save the money and decides, "Its time to go shopping for that clock!". He sees this beautiful antique piece at a store and gets in to take a good look and decides - its perfect!! So he goes up to the storekeeper and asks him for the price. The store keeper says, "$9000."
Our man is thinking, "Wow, that is a steal!" but he doesnt want to buy that easy without even a shot at negotiation. So he starts giving the storekeeper this whole shpeel, "You know as i was looking at that clock i noticed it was really dusty .. and it had a few scratches. I also noticed the price tag was quite faded. It looks like this piece has not only been here for really long.. it has not been taken care off that well. I am quite uncomfortable paying that kind of money for this clock. I'll tell you what though - I am going to make you a great offer... I will pay you $8000 ..All cash of course right away. But no more than that.."
The shopkeeper without batting an eyelid says immediately - "Done!"

The question Michael asked us was - "Do you think the guy left the shop feeling satisfied?"
The answer is very obvious - No he would not be satisfied.
And the reason for that is primarily because he was DENIED THE PROCESS of negotiating.
He was denied the whole 3 act drama of the storekeeper saying - "Ohl but how will i feed my wife and kids! I will make absolutely no margin if i sell to you at that price ! (storekeeper holding head in hands) I absolutely can't." etc etc. And then finally of watching the storekeeper appear to come around to your price.
That is the process that we all understand and expect.. anything less and of course we feel cheated!

I couldn't stop thinking about that story and creating analogies in other contexts.
So i was thinking I've heard this one phrase quite often - "Men like the chase better than the catch".
Newsflash 1- Thats not true just for men by the way, thats true for all people.
Newsflash 2: Its not because we are mercenary - its because we understand that like all good things in life romance is a process. When you come too easily (naughty naughty anna!! and bad bad pun!!) you are denying me the PROCESS OF PLAYING THE ROMANCE GAME' with you.. of wondering if you like me, of second guessing you, of the banter, of being coy with you .. i could go on!
Of course we feel cheated!!

... Arrey kaash meri in aankhon ki ab roshni bujh jaaye,
Maine dekha tha jo khwaab woh mujhko na kabhi yaad aaye...

Time for a few small repairs...

I was not planning on writing this. Its one of those things i couldn't help think about but i had promised myself - i absolutely DO NOT need to write / talk about every single thing i angst about .. but well like Soul Asylum says.. "One more promise i couldn't keep."

So here goes .. all i had to vent through the week :

1. Why do you naturally assume i will behave badly in a not-so-regular situation? Is that really how stupid i appear to you! Do i really need to be told 3 times that i should behave a certain way when i meet you in a different context!

2. If i admit to a weakness to someone - its because i think i can - which means i laugh and this someone laughs .. and the joke ends there. If you laugh about it when i am not laughing - you're just being mean.

3. Venting does not mean that i can't take care of a problem. I lived 28 years without your help - i can make the next week as well. Venting is what i need you for - solving i can do all by myself - Thank you very much!

Funny, you'd think i'd feel better after saying all that...

And its here...

This warrants a post.. i finally have my new car. Its a black, very cool looking santro.

I drove it home last night and it wasnt as bad as i thought it would be even though G had to rescue me oh so many times even at 1130 pm in the night.

It is currently parked outside my house in a non-shielded park place with its butt jutting out more than it should be - and like every other half-important thing in my life - its giving me sleepless nights. Yes, I am still terrified of driving - even more so now that its here.

i soo badly want to drive and be brave enough to drive and not be overwhelmed by having bought a car and not be telling everybody about how the fear is killing me. I want to be someone else for a few days... and whizz past town confidently and just be able to enjoy it!

Arrghh!

8th March, Thu, 6:43 am

I am writing this from office.. which means i am in office at 643 am!!!
I should have been in a flight to Mumbai but i am not - because Air Deccan delayed its 5:55 am flight... Not just delayed mind you, delayed by 6 hours! So now the bloody thing will leave only at 1130 am!!

I cannot begin to tell you how frustrated i am. Was at friends place last night - got home only by 11, packed and slept only by midnight. Cab guy who was supposed to show up by 420 calls me up at 330 am to ask for directions to home.. proceeds to get it wrong anyway and keeps calling till 410 am which is when he actually reaches.. so BASICALLY i have had about 3 hours of sleep.. i am in office and i have a v. short holiday which has been cut short by another half a day..

Not fair..I really just want to sleep :(

everybody loved him.. everybody disapeared..

Since i brought up Jerry Maguire - i should tell you i liked the movie...
so here are some memorable lines from it..

------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dorothy: I love him! I love him for the man he wants to be. And I love him for the man he almost is.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ray: D'you know that the human head weighs 8 pounds?
Jerry Maguire: Did you know that Troy Aikman, in only six years, has passed for 16,303 yards?
Ray: D'you know that bees and dogs can smell fear?
Jerry Maguire: Did you know that the career record for hits is 4,256 by Pete Rose who is NOT in the Hall of Fame?
Ray: D'you know that my next door neighbor has three rabbits?
Jerry Maguire: I... I can't compete with that!
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Jerry Maguire: What do you want from me? My soul?
Dorothy: Why not? I deserve that much.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dicky Fox: Hey... I don't have all the answers. In life, to be honest, I have failed as much as I have succeeded. But I love my life. I love my wife. And I wish you my kind of success.

i-n-s-p-i-r-e

Watched Flags of our Fathers this weekend... Not bad! Not superlative either..
I know me a little better now.. so i know i don't need the bloody reality of it.. am quite happy with the romanticized version. Not to say this one wasn't romanticized- but i could do with more! Which explains why i particularly liked the ending speech, i guess - "... they might have fought for their countries, but they died for their friends.."

..To quote Dorothy from Jerry Maguire - "I just want to be inspired".

The word is disquiet..

Still with the feeling.. but now i have a word for it..
disquiet: lack of calm, peace or ease; anxiety; uneasiness

Funny the feeling should persist inspite of meeting Mr. S etc.
You'd think that should have considerably un-disquieted me.. or is it quieted me?
Well, it hasn't..

BOOOREDD!!

I am really bored!
Which is funny because i actually feel like something is about to happen..
and i am waiting for it to strike.. but in the meantime - BORED out of my skull..

Nucking futs!!

I am really terrified of driving.

I might have managed if it was a straight road and i didn't have to start the car and there were no people or cows involved.. so basically not getting very far..
Today the driving instructor told me, "6 classes ma, you still can't start means.." :(

But FYI - its not that easy!
and everybody who's been driving since they were 6 can just go screw themselves because when at 60 (ok fine - 28) you start learning and suddenly discover that ALL the people in this city are always walking ON the road 8 abreast .with their cow -- Its really very very scary!!

You may be right - i may be crazy

Left work at 430 pm today and in the wake of "potential tension in the city", went to fab india and blew 3k and something ..... on BED COVERSS!!
Just bad behaviour i tell you.
Hmmm...When i grow up i will save!

Blood Cauvery

In blood diamond people killed for diamonds..
In the TN vs Karnataka Cauvery battle - people kill for water.
I wonder if for people to kill - it would have to be one of the 2 extremes - basic or precious..
And i wonder if the same guy would kill for both or does it take 2 kinds?
And if it does take 2 kinds - i wonder what kind you are?
Would you kill for the basic or the precious? (and thanks, but i already know that basic and precious are relative).
Personally, i think i may be a 'basic' killer.
Do you think a "basic" killer is just a tad okay-er than a "precious" killer? (Objection! Leading!)

Its time to write again..

After 10 months and no action (on blog or otherwise) its time to start again.. on blog and on life.

Quick update - change of job, no change in life.. so much for 10 months of invisibility - still nothing to say.. but i have to admit - life is not so "deep sigh" anymore (refer to previous blog). Not sure why that is.. will think about it and tell you..

What else, acha gets married - May 10th '07. Really looking forward to this!!
Plan on buying a car.. soon - but since i don't know how to drive and i am not a fan of learning anything i hadn't picked up by the age of 4 so not looking forward to this.. i suspect there will be a few blogs on this ..

Not that much else i can think of for now.. see you soon hopefully (will certainly not be a 10 month wait)