"If this is uncomfortable, we don't have to.."
"Yes, i understand... And i love you."
"i don't mean to upset you - are you okay?"
i do mean all these things i say.

but the language - this i learnt from you.
This is not the grammar i knew.
I vaguely remember another me,
She spoke a little differently.

A lot more "WHAT IF", "NOT" and "NO",
"Uncomfortable, My big fat shiny toe!"
"That discussion is still on the table",
"Disagreeing is not rude. That is a lazy label."

You did not like her, she could tell,
You didn not have to scream or yell.
You just ignored her till she began to fade
Why accept or reject what you can evade.

She went away...but because she was SHE,
She looked one final time at me,
I was learning the new language when she said,
"Doll, don't forget i am not dead.
 When you are done with 'nice' and you want more,
Just raise your voice, and i will come through that door"

I haven't called her in. Not yet.
She may disrupt what it took me ten years to set.
I miss her, i wish she would visit me
And we could both remember what i used to be.